May 25

Today was a rough day. I thought it’d be good to be with people, with John and Grandma, in the a nice house out in the desert, but I’m just questioning myself: what am I doing? What is my life purpose? I feel lost. I looked at her instagram last night, and her 2018 story. […]

Weird night music

Weird night musicWhat does it meanDisconnected distractedDreaming without a dreamPiano landscapeFloating down radio wavesUnanchored, unmooredSounds across timeSomber and seriousWeirdly veiledMystery beyond the ParnassusWhy nowIs it a poemWhat is a poemWhat is lifeResolve into inherentWhat do I wantWhat do I needDescending spiralsSilence Then… … EbullientHope shimmeringYou can’t take hopeIt’s not yours to giveYou are a part […]

May 10 – An example journal entry

Friday. Nothing going on at work, so I had breakfast in bed, read Gotham, read Yalom. Tried to schedule my laser pointer shoot, but this is proving difficult. Must return to it. Later, I generally figured out what I would talk about at tonight’s stand-up comedy open mic, and wrote the topics into my iPhone’s […]

If perhaps in some distant world revealed

If perhaps in some distant world revealedYour beauty old and lovely lately laughsSmiling eyes and distant hearts renewed inEarnest spring awakened eyes in flowers I want to tell you everything, a roseIs somewhere deep within the sound of sleepWhere dreams can lithely liven feelings faintAnd unfasten ever my darling’s smile Rosy wastrel, come and ride […]

Growth

Spring is upon us. I exalt in the freshness, the light rains, giving way to long warm sunshine days, green and color everywhere. Is it possible to grow as a person? To change as a human being? To become better? I hope so. Has my life been a stagnant cesspool, where I’m just blowing wherever […]